Twisted Fairy Tales
by hikibou YYH43
Summary: You know the fairly tales you read when you were little... Well Yu Yu Hakusho took them over and twisted them around
1. Three Little Pigs

A/N: We are writing a new story!!! Glad caus we are!!  
  
Disclaimer: We dont own anything. not a penny not a piece of dust. so what makes you think we own Yu Yu Hakusho!  
  
If ya didnt already know I am Kelly and my counterpart is Valerie! We are both stupid so sorry for any misspelled words!!  
  
K: Ah convo time my fav part  
  
V: what about the actual story  
  
K: Well this I am in it  
  
H: Stupid ningen  
  
K: WHAT DID U SAY?  
  
H: Stupid ningen  
  
K: Ningen NINGEN  
  
V: Calm down Kelly  
  
K: I MOST CERTANLY WILL NOT!  
  
Kur: Kelly Please calm yourself  
  
K:ok  
  
V&H: (anime fall)  
  
K: please r&r  
  
V: We take everything!! from shoes to cows  
  
K: psst Val I dont think they can actually give us shoes or cows!  
  
V: I think they can  
  
V: WHY DO U MAKE ME SAY ALL THE STUPID STUFF  
  
K: Caus u are my slave mortal!! and caus I am the extremely demented one!  
  
Kur: On with the Story  
  
H: hn  
  
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The Three Little Pigs  
  
One day the three little pigs were building there houses. The first little pig build his house out of straw. His name was Kuwabara. The second pig made his house out of twigs. His name was Yusuke. The third pig made his house out of bricks. His name was Kurama.  
  
"Maybe you should make your houses out of bricks too" Kurama said  
  
"We're fine. It's not like theres going to be a big bad serial killer going to come and eat all of us" Yusuke said  
  
"Yeah. I mean what are the chances of that happening?" Kuwabara said  
  
They all went home for bed. Kuwabara was at home sitting on the floor.  
  
"This little piggy went to market. This little piggy stayed home. This little piggy had roast beef. This little piggy had none. This little piggy went weeeee weeeee weeeee all the way home. HA HA HA HA HA" Kuwabara said cracking up on the floor.  
  
"There is a pig killer on the loose" The radio said  
  
"Uh oh. Maybe Kurama was right!" He said  
  
*Knock Knock*  
  
'Who is it?" Kuwabara said  
  
"Hiei (AKA The Pig Killer)"  
  
"Who are you?" Kuwabara said  
  
"The Pig Killer" Hiei said  
  
"WHAT" Kuwabara yelled  
  
"Let me in" Hiei said  
  
"Ha try to get in" Kuwabara said  
  
"I already have" Hiei said standding behind Kuwabara  
  
Kuwabara looked around his house. It was destroyed! He ran out away screaming to Yusuke's house.  
  
"Why do they always have to fight it" Hiei thought to him self  
  
Kuwabara ran to Yusuke's house. The door bursted open.  
  
"Kuwabara! What are you doing here?" Yusuke said  
  
"THERE IS A PIG KILLER ON THE LOOSE!" Kuwabara yelled  
  
"Yeah I know I heard" Yusuke said  
  
"HE WAS AT MY HOUSE" Kuwabara yelled  
  
"Yeah well he's not coming" Yusuke said looking out the window  
  
"Your right. I'm already here" Hiei said standding behind them  
  
They both yelled running out of the house and to Kurama's  
  
"K-K-KILLER" They both yelled  
  
"Oh yes him I heard about him. Did you know he has a partner? Do you know who he is?"  
  
"Kurama" Hiei said standding behind them  
  
"WHAT" They both yelled  
  
"Its true" Kurama said  
  
Hiei grabbed them both and slashed them both and they both fell to the ground. Kurama and Hiei had a great dinner that night and lived happily ever after.  
  
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A/N: Sorry guys. Yusuke and Kuwabara did die. It sux I know but I hate them both and as pigs I'm sure they looked yummy and Kurama is a fox so every one is happy except Kuwabara and Yusuke. They will be in other fairy tales though.  
  
K: I hate them both to  
  
H: Me too  
  
Kur: I think It was mean  
  
V: Come on Kurama wasn't fun being evil  
  
Kur: Yeah kinda  
  
K: Yeah it's always fun being evil  
  
H: Even I think it is fun  
  
Yusuke&Kuwabara: That was the worst fairy tale ever  
  
V: Well its four against two so we win. Please review 


	2. Rapunzel

A/N: Hey guys its Val and Kelly again. Good news sort of.. Kuwabara and Yusuke are alive again but there not going to be in this fairy tale so lets start convo time.  
  
K: Yeah this is my favorite  
  
V: We know Kelly we know  
  
H: Yeah you told us ningen  
  
K: IM NOT A NINGEN  
  
Kur: Calm down Kelly  
  
K: Anything for you Kurama  
  
H: She is so annoying  
  
V: Thats why she's my best friend  
  
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Rapunzel  
  
One day botan was in the garden for no reason what so ever and then the witch Keiko came and stole her away from her faimly and put her in a tall tower were she waited for a while. Her hair grew out longer and longer till it was really long. Every day the witch Keiko called out "Botan Botan let down your hair" and every day she let down her long blue hair and the witch being to lazy to use her broom would climb up it. One day Prince Kurama followed the witch and found out about Botan and went to the tower the next day.  
  
"Botan Botan let down your hair" Kurama said  
  
"WHAT" Botan yelled to him not knowing what he said  
  
"LET DOWN YOUR HAIR" Kurama yelled back  
  
"WHAT LET DOWN MY WHAT" Botan yelled  
  
"YOUR HAIR" Kurama yelled  
  
"MY HAIR?" Botan yelled back  
  
"YES LET DOWN YOUR HAIR" Kurama yelled  
  
"OK HOLD ON" Botan said letting down her hair and pulling off her wig. Kurama left the tower to think of some other way to get her down.  
  
Later...  
  
Kurama came back with a rope.  
  
"OK I'M GOING TO THROW UP THE ROPE AND YOU HAVE TO CATCH IT" Kurama yelled  
  
"OK" Botan yelled back  
  
"OK I'M GOING TO CLIMB UP THE ROPE" Kurama yelled  
  
"OK" Botan yelled back  
  
Kurama got half way up the rope and fell  
  
"Damn I should of paid more attention in gym" Kurama thought to him-self  
  
Later (again)...  
  
Kurama came back yet again to try to get Botan down. He pulled a rose from his hair and turned it into a whip. He tried to reach the balcony with his rose whip so he could climb up it and get her. He reached the balcony but he chopped it off so Botan couldn't go on it.  
  
"YOU CAN USE THE STAIRS IN THE BACK IF YOUR TRYING TO GET UP" Botan yelled  
  
Kurama looked up in rage. He walked up the stairs and fell down them into a thorn bush. It scratched his eyes and he was blind. Botan ran down the stairs and ran to Kurama and started to cry. The tears from her eyes magicly cured him. They shared a romantic kiss and got married. They had a handsome son and a beautiful castle. Six years they got a devorce and then another two years later they got back together again. THEN they lived happily ever after.  
  
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A/N: Botan and Kurama are you cute together don't you think so. I don't want to type right now because Kelly isn't here and she is being lazy so no convo time and plus every one is at home. Hiei and Kurama have to sleep to you know so bye every. 


	3. Hansel and Gretel

A/N: Back U like the other chapter. Val really outdone herself!! She wrote the whole chapter! We'd like to thank ALL our reviewers. Right at the moment I dont have the names cause I aint on the internet!!  
  
Disclaimer: STOP MAKING FUN OF US CAUSE WERE POOR!!! WE CAN EVEN AFFORED TO OWN A PIECE PAPER!  
  
K: Thinking...  
  
V: About?  
  
H: She is thinking about Her and Kura....  
  
K: SHUT UP SHRIMP!  
  
Kur: Thats no way to talk Kelly  
  
K: Sorry  
  
V: WHATS THAT  
  
K: (a tad bit softer) sorry  
  
H: Sorry couldnt hear you  
  
K: DAMN TOO YOU HEARD ME!!  
  
V: Nope sorry what was it again  
  
K: WHY IS EVERYBODY BENT AGAINST ME  
  
Kur: I'm not  
  
K: I love you  
  
Kur: I love You Too  
  
H: Aww I hate All of you  
  
V: Really I hate you too  
  
K: What about me  
  
Kur: I think Kuwabara hates you  
  
H: Why would he need to when I hate her  
  
Kur: WHAT WAS THAT?? (getting a tad bit to protective)  
  
V: Wow I feel Loved  
  
K: Whatever! On with the story...  
  
V: Review  
  
H: hn (while running away from a angry Kitsune)  
  
Kur: WE TAKE FLAMES, COMPLIMENTS, LETTERS OF HATE TO OUR LEAST FAV KUWA, AND ALL!! DIE KOORIME!!!!  
  
K: WAIT!!! before I go I checked the reviews cause I got on the internet  
  
V: Yes and thank you all for your reviews and requests. cause we couldnt think of anything since we have no childhood  
  
H: hn  
  
K: And there was one review that caught my attention  
  
V: Lady Lanet we would like to say  
  
K: NO YAOI!  
  
V: NO PAIRING KURAMA AND HIEI  
  
Kur & H: (looks at each other strangly) NOOO!! MOMMY WHAT DID WE DO WRONG  
  
K: Dont worry Kurama is not gay, neither is Hiei  
  
V: Yeah my Hiei isnt like that  
  
Kur: YOUR Hiei  
  
V: (blushes) thanks Lady Lanet for reviewing and not supporting Kurama & hieis and Karasu  
  
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Hansel & Gretel  
  
One day Hiei and Yukina were in bed and over heard their mom talking to her- self.  
  
"I have to get rid of them" Hina said  
  
"Moms gone crazy" Hiei said to Yukina  
  
"What should we do?" Yukina said  
  
"Kill her?" Hiei said  
  
"NO" Yukina yelled  
  
"Wow shes gone death too" Hiei said looking at his mom wondering why she didn't hear Yukina yell  
  
"I'm tired well finish this tomorrow" Yukina said climbing into her bed  
  
"Are you kidding? Our mom is trying to kill us and you want to sleep" Hiei said  
  
Yukina was already a sleep  
  
That Morrning...  
  
"Ok kids were going for a walk in the dark, scary, dangerus forest" Hina said  
  
"She's probally is going to get us lost" Hiei said  
  
"She wouldn't do that" Yukina said  
  
Later...  
  
*Yukina crying* "Were lost. I can't belive she left us here" Yukina said sobbing  
  
"Its ok Yukina I'll get us back" Hiei said with Yukina crying inhis arms  
  
"We've been walking with her for hours and she just left us here" Yukina said  
  
"Actually our house is right over there" Hiei said  
  
"What?" Yukina said looking over at their house  
  
They both ran inside  
  
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO... I mean I'm glad your home kids I thought you got lost" Hina said  
  
"Yeah great" Hiei said  
  
"Ok time for bed" Hina said  
  
"Buts it's only three pm" Yukina said  
  
"BED NOW" Hina yelled  
  
They both ran into bed  
  
Morrnig (Once again)...  
  
"come along kids I have some candy in the forest we went into yesterday" Hina said  
  
"Yeah candy" Yukina said  
  
"I hate candy" Hiei said  
  
"Too bad Hiei lets go" Hina said  
  
Later...  
  
"I CAN'T BELIVE WERE LOST AGAIN AND WE DIDN'T GET ANY CANDY" Yukina cried once again sobbing in Hiei's arms  
  
"Well theres a house made out of candy over there if you want candy" Hiei said  
  
They walked over to the house and a old lady welcomed them "Well Hello Children?"  
  
"WHO YOU CALLING CHILDREN?" Hiei shouted  
  
"You!"  
  
"OH"  
  
"Want candy?"  
  
"YAY CANDY!" Yukina cried  
  
"Who are you?" Hiei asked the old lady  
  
"Why I am Genkai!"  
  
]  
  
"Genkai, Genkai! Where have I heard that name before..."  
  
"Well I am the ...."  
  
"Wait Wait I think I got it... nope never mind I dont know who you are!"  
  
"I WANT CANDY!" Yukina screamed, she was now crying and making tear gems  
  
Genkai smiled at her "You want the candy sweat heart?"  
  
Yukina smiled sadly  
  
"WELL THEN DO 100 PUSH UPS!" Genkai shouted  
  
"p-p-push ups! I DONT KNOW HOW TO DO push ups!"  
  
"WELL THEN I'LL LOCK YOU UP INSIDE MY OVEN AND COOK YOU FOR THE MAN EATING BAT GUY!"  
  
"NO!" Hiei Growled  
  
but before they knew it they were in it. It even surprised superfast super macho Hiei.  
  
"AHHH. Were going to die and be eaten" Yukina cried  
  
"No she left it opened" Hiei said walking out of the oven  
  
"Oh ok then" Yukina said following Hiei  
  
Hiei knocked a pale of water that was so perfectly placed right above her and she melted and Yukina and Hiei lived it the house and eventually ate it all and moved back home and lived happily ever after untill Hina tried to get rid of them again but she didn't so they did live happily ever after.  
  
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A/N: LIKE!! We needed a fic with Yukina in it cause well Ice Appiristionists are the best!  
  
K: Duh Ice  
  
V: Yeah ok  
  
Kur: dont u just love her  
  
H: no  
  
K: WHAT?? NO ONE LOVES ME!!!  
  
Kur: I do  
  
K: Oh ok  
  
Kur: So Hiei if you dont love Kelly, who do u love?  
  
H: mumble mumble mumble  
  
K: REVENGE SORRY HIEI I DIDNT HEAR IT  
  
V: (Blushing)  
  
H: I love Val  
  
V: Love is so evil. Hate Is worlds Love  
  
H: Its so beuatiful how she speaks  
  
K: Uh... cough cough GAY cough cough  
  
Kur: Kelly stop being mean  
  
K: OK!!  
  
V: Review  
  
K: We take everything  
  
Kur: so go now  
  
H: hn 


	4. Humpdy Dumpdy

A/N: thank you for all your reviews! right now I will respond to some of them:  
  
K: Due to all the complaints there will be no more Botan/Kurama. BUT there will be no Botan/Koenma. And no Kurama with *shudders* hiei or *shaking* Karasu!  
  
V: We are not going off either dubbed or Japenese version caus we just arent. To us the story is the story so we follow by what happens in the episodes we see.  
  
K: (calming Val down)  
  
V: HIEI IS MINE!!  
  
K: uhh -_-;;  
  
Kur: Off that subject.  
  
H: hn  
  
K: Well that is convo time  
  
V: THATS IT JUST RESPONDING TO A FEW REVIEWS  
  
Kur: I think so  
  
K: well read  
  
V: review  
  
H: hn  
  
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Humpty Dumpty  
  
Kuwabara sat on a wall  
  
Kuwabara had a great fall  
  
All the kings horses and all the Kings men  
  
Didn't want to put Kuwabara back together again  
  
Kuwabara eventually put himself back together again  
  
Then he filed a law suit against Yusuke claiming he was pushed off the wall and had a great fall.  
  
At court...  
  
"We're here to settle the terrible case of Was kuwabara pushed?" *dun dun dun* a news reporter said  
  
"All stand for the for the honorable judge Hiei" a man said  
  
Hiei walked in  
  
"All may sit" The man said  
  
"Ok then whats wrong" Hiei said  
  
"He pushed me off the wall" Kuwabara said  
  
"NO I DIDN'T" Yusuke yelled  
  
"YES TOU DID" Kuwabara yelled back  
  
The yelling went on for hours then they were fighting with complimentary cat screeches and a smoke dust and then Hiei killed them both because he got tired and the whole town had a omlet and lived happily ever after.  
  
The End  
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A/N: Man did Val and I have NO childhood what so ever. We have no clue how little red ridding hood goes!  
  
K: School sucks  
  
V: Yes it does  
  
Kur: I like school  
  
H: hn  
  
K: I HAVE MR. TULLO AGAIN  
  
V: OH NO  
  
H: who the hell is Mr. Tullo  
  
Kur: Only the meanest gym teacher whom always picks on my poor Kelly  
  
H: hn stupid ningens  
  
V: Hiei? dont say....  
  
K: WHAT DID YOU SAY SHRIMP  
  
H: call me shrimp I kill you  
  
K: Jumbo Shrimp!!  
  
H: DIE  
  
Kurama jumps in front of Kelly and Hiei stops the attack  
  
K: HAHAHAHHA  
  
V: Review  
  
H: hn 


	5. Cindarellia Spelling for that? No clue

A/N: Hiya we're back and we just watched Rescue Yukina in Japanese!! Man are those voices funny!! Ahh!! Great stuff. Thank you all whom reviewed! Right now I cant state who review cause I aint online at the moment but we appreciate it! Anyways...  
  
Does anyone know how to bold and italic? If you do can u please add how to in a review (hint hint) We would apprieciate it very much! PLEASE!!  
  
K: Wow School is making me a busy body  
  
V: It is making me stupid  
  
K: I hate being a busy body  
  
Kur: I like school. But it too easy  
  
K: Your Wierd!  
  
V: It is making Kellys brain reduce to -30  
  
H: hn. She never had a brain in the first place  
  
V: And an attention span of a butterfly  
  
Kur: I think Kelly is smart  
  
H: that prooves your sanity  
  
K: (to her self) -_-;; I hate it when they talk about me like I am not here but really I am!  
  
V: Well ok! Guess what Kelly and I went to the Red Hot Chili Peppers concert tonight!!  
  
K: It was awsome We saw the RHCP and The Queens of the Stone Age  
  
Kur: Must have been very entertaining  
  
H: hn  
  
K: Anthony is so HOT!!  
  
V: even though he is like 40 years old  
  
K&V: Now were gonna shut up cause our throught hurts from screeming so much!!  
  
H: Bakas!  
  
Kur: Im sorry Hiei you got the wrong people! Taylor is Baka! Kelly is Aku- Oni! Val is Chibi!  
  
H: hn  
  
Kur: Please review  
  
H: (mumbling incorectly) *Censore* *Censore*  
  
Kur: HIEI NO NEED FOR LANGUAGE! Anywho please r&r! Now for the story  
  
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Cindarellia  
  
Once there was a poor girl named Keikorellia. She lived with her evil step- sister Botan and Shizuru. Lets not forget her evil step-mom Genkai. So any way they were bossing poor Keikorellia around  
  
"Keikorellia clean the floor"  
  
"Clean the windows"  
  
"Make dinner"  
  
"Do the dishes"  
  
"Your so lazy"  
  
"Move it"  
  
"I'm going as fast as I can" Keikorellia said  
  
"Well move faster" Botan said (v: sounds like you Kelly)  
  
"Yes sister" Keikorellia said rushing every which way  
  
*Knock Knock* Some one knocked on the door  
  
"KEIKORELLIA GO GET THE FRICKIN DOOR YOU LAZY ASS" Genkia yelled  
  
"Yes mam" She said walking to the door  
  
"Hello Prince Yusuke is having a ball and all the young ladies are invited" A small man said  
  
Just then Shizuru pushed her away and grabbed the invatation and slammed the door.  
  
"Oh perfect you two finally have a chance to meet the Prince" Genkai said pointing to Botan and Shizuru  
  
"Um.. Can I go" Keikorellia asked  
  
Every one started to laught except for Keikorellia  
  
Two Days Later...  
  
They stopped laughing  
  
"You can go if you finish all your chores" Genkai said  
  
"Ok when is the ball" Keikorellia asked  
  
"We're leaving now see ya" Genkai said while Botan, Shizuru, and her walked out the some how all dressed up  
  
"WHAT" Keikorellia yelled  
  
It was too late they were already gone. Keikorellia ran into her room crying. Out of no were a blast of light came in front of her.  
  
"Hello Keikorellia. I'm Yukina your fairy god mother" She said  
  
"Um... Hi" Keikorellia said surprised  
  
"Ok sweety whats wrong" Yukina said  
  
"Um.. Well you see my sisters and mom went to the party without me and um I want to go and I can't because I have to finish my chores and I don't have anything to wear" Keikorellia said  
  
"Ok I can help you with that" Yukina waved her wand and the whole house was cleaned and Keikorellia was in a beautiful light blue dress with beautiful glass slippers. Keikorellia started to walk but her slippes broke and cut her foot.  
  
"Oh crap" Keikorellia said  
  
"Don't worry sweety I can fix it" Yukina said  
  
"Oh ok" Keikorellia said  
  
Yukina waved her wand and the shoe was fixed.  
  
"Thanx" Keikorellia said  
  
"Ok then transpatation" Yukina said  
  
She waved her want at Kuwabara who was walking by and he turned into a horse. They looked at him he was the ugliest hourse ever but it was all they had so they kept him. She also waved at a pumkin which turned into a charriot.  
  
"Right then you'll be on your was oh you need to be back by twelve o' clock" Yukina said  
  
"Ok no problem" Keikorellia said  
  
At the ball...  
  
Keikorellia walked in. Prince Yusuke saw her.  
  
"Care to dance" Yusuke said  
  
"I'd love to " Keikorellia said  
  
They danced for hours. It was 11:50  
  
"I have to go" Keikorellia said running out the door  
  
"WAIT... YOUR NAME" Yusuke yelled but couldn't get her. He ran out to her but all he could find was a glass slipper.  
  
The next day...  
  
"That little bitch. How how dare she run out on Prince Yusuke and hog him all to her self" Shizuru said  
  
"Yeah" Botan said  
  
"Don't worry there will be other chances" Genkai said  
  
*Knock Knock* Some one was at the door.  
  
Shizuru opened the door  
  
"WHAT" Shizuru yelled  
  
"Um.. The prince has ordered a search" The man said  
  
"Oh for who" Genkai said  
  
"The person whoes foot can fit into this glass slipper will marry the Prince" The mab said holding the slipper in his hand  
  
"Oh well come in" Botan said  
  
They both tried on the slipper but it was to small for both of them.  
  
"Is there any other young ladies in the house" The man said  
  
"NO" They all yelled  
  
Just then Keikorellia walked in.  
  
"Oh yeah her" Genkai said  
  
"Ms. can you try on this slipper" The man said  
  
"Here I'll give it to her" Genkai said  
  
She dropped it, but it didn't brake because she was so short. She blasted it with a spirit wave.  
  
"Oh would you look at that" Genkai said with a grin on her face  
  
Keikorellia walked into her room and pick up her glass slipper and walked out  
  
"Here is another one" Keikorellia said  
  
"YOU... YOU ARE THE GIRL HE'S LOOKING FOR" The man said  
  
"Me" She said  
  
He grabbed her hand and put her into the charriot and went to the castle. He took her to the Prince. The got married and lived happily ever after.  
  
THE END  
  
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A/N: Sry for All the spelling mistakes but school has gotten us a bit slower than usual.  
  
K: Kelly  
  
V: Kelly  
  
Kur: Kelly  
  
H: What The Fuck are we saying Kelly  
  
Kur: Sinple Random insanity  
  
H: never knew you had it in you Kitsune  
  
K&V: WERE DID WE GO!!  
  
H: No where your right besides me  
  
V: that is the closest thing that you said to me that was nice  
  
K: NICE!! AWW (gets spasms)  
  
Kur: ILL GIVE HIM LESSON  
  
H: YOU DO I WILL KILL YOUR MATE!  
  
K: I am right here!  
  
H: I KNOW  
  
K: so do u LOVE Val  
  
H: (mumble mumble mumble)  
  
V: Whats that  
  
H: (mumble mumble)  
  
Kur: Sorry cant hear you  
  
H: YES I LOVE HER....grrrr  
  
V: YIPPEE!! its got me in such a great mood that YOU HAVE TO review! 


	6. Rumplestilkskin

A/N: Well um people who didnt get it Keikorellia is KEIKOrellia. So Keiko is Cinderella. Just clearing that up.  
  
K: Convo Convo Convo Sations  
  
V: Convo Convo Convo Sations  
  
Kur: Convo Convo Convo Sations  
  
H: Fuck Off  
  
Kur: no need for language  
  
K: Read  
  
V: review  
  
H: hn  
  
K: too lazy to right a real convo time  
  
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Rumpelstltskin  
  
Once upon a time there was a miller who was poor, but he had a beautiful daughter. Now it just so happened he was talking to the King one day and to make him-self seem important he told the king  
  
"I have a daughter named Keiko and she can spin straw into gold" The miller said  
  
"That pleases me" King Yusuke said "If your daughter is as talented as you say she is bring her to the castel tomorrow, and I'll put her to the test"  
  
Keiko was brought to the castel and Yusuke brought her to a large room filled with straw. Yusuke said  
  
"If you don't turn all this straw into gold I will kill you" and then he left locking the door  
  
Keiko started to cry and then a little man walked in. He was short, wore all black, and had black hair that had a white stripe in it (Guess Who).  
  
"Why are you crying girl?" The little man said  
  
"Um... I have to spin all this straw into gold by tomorrow or I will be killed" Keiko said  
  
"What will you give me if I do that" He asked  
  
"My necklace" She answered  
  
The man grabbed the necklace and started to spin the straw into gold. He worked all night but got all the straw turned into gold. Then he left. The king walked in and was surprised to see all the straw turned into gold. But his heart grew even greedier and brought her to and even larger room and told her to turn the straw into gold again or she would be killed. She started to once again weep. The man appeared again too.  
  
"Suck it up wuss" He said "How the fuck did you get into this again you moron. Ok what will you give me if I turn the straw into gold again?" He asked  
  
"The ring from my finger" She said  
  
He grabbed the ring and spun the straw into gold. The King walked in the next day and was surprised to see the straw was again turned into gold, but his lust for gold was not yet satisfied. He brought her to an even lager room and said to turn the straw into gold once more and if she did he would marry her. He left the room once again and the started to cry. The man appeared again.  
  
"Suck it you moron" He said "What will you give me if I once again turn the straw into gold"  
  
"I have nothing left to give" She said  
  
"Ok then you must promise me you first child" He said  
  
"Ok" She said  
  
He turned the straw into gold once again and the king walked in the next day to find that all the straw was once again turned into gold. The king married Keiko and after a year she gave birth to a some-what cute baby. The little man appeared in Keiko's room and told her to give her the baby.  
  
"Please I'll give you all the treasure in the castel if I could keep my baby" Keiko said  
  
"Nope" He said, but he felt pitty on her so he said "I'll give you three days and if you can guess my name before the three days are up I'll let you keep your baby"  
  
Keiko sent all her servants to find all the names they could find. The next day the little man came back again. Keiko blurted all the names on the list but all the man said was  
  
"Thats not my name"  
  
Then Keiko sent all servants to get more names. The next day he came back. She said a bunch of names. But none of them was his name. He left and she once again she sent her servant to get more names. They all came back and said they couldn't find any more new names. One sevant came bursting in and said  
  
"I saw a little man dancing around a fire singing  
  
Today I'll brew, tomorrow I'll bake  
Soon I'll have the queens namesake  
Oh, how hard it is to play my game  
for Rumpelstilskin is my name"  
  
Keiko was so happy when she heard the news. When the man came on the third day the queen ran up to him and said  
  
"Your nameis Rumpelstilskin" She said  
  
"Um... No" He said  
  
"But my servant saw you dancing around your fire last night and said your name was Rumpelstilskin" Keiko said  
  
"I don't dance" He said  
  
"WHAT" Keiko said  
  
"Keep your ugly offspring and my name is Hiei you moron" He said and walked away but not before steeling every treasure in the castel.  
  
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A/N: Does anyone know how bold/italic and how i am able to get anyonomous reviews?  
  
(spoilers for us dumb americans on the outcome of Karasu vs. Kurama)  
  
Kur: I KILLED KARASU!!!  
  
V: But you lost!  
  
K: AND YOU ALMOST DIE!! I was so scared  
  
H: good fight Kurama  
  
Kur: he was creeping me out!! how he was saying all that stuff about my hair and my face??  
  
K: grrrr  
  
V: uh...hehehe...soo....Hiei why did you punish your own arm? Kind of stupid  
  
H: hn  
  
K: Ok we are getting wierder every second so...  
  
Kur: Review Please!  
  
V&K: JA NE!!!  
  
V: (wispering) psst kelly what does that mean  
  
H: hn it means good bye! 


	7. The Boy who Cried Wolf

A/N: We accept anoynomous reviews! uhh well just one thing to say...  
  
V: Ew OH MY GOD ew so so mean  
  
K: grr....  
  
Kur: I cant believe it  
  
H: stupid Ningens  
  
K: what did you call me  
  
H: not you I was talking about that 3rd rate author  
  
K: oh ok grrr....  
  
V: not fair  
  
K: anime tears  
  
V: anime tears  
  
K: ( sorry to be a burden to you guys with our whinning but this author coppied us and changed it a bit that it was what we wanted to do for a sequel) grr that Rumi girl!! Stealing OUR ideas about Top Ten things to keep Hiei away fom, but no she revised it to TOP TEN THINGS TO KEEP KURAMA AWAY FROM  
  
Kur: grrr...  
  
V: and she totally stole our idea and plus the writing isnt very good either  
  
H: so now that they have complained to all of you readers....  
  
Kur: grrrr... Oh I mean... they would like you to review  
  
K&V: WAHHHHHHH!!!!! ANIME TEARS X 10!!  
  
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The Boy Who Cried Wolf  
  
One day Kuwabara was watching his father's sheep. They ran towards him.  
  
"Aw come give me a hug little sheeps" He said but they ran over him leaving him unconcious for about ten minutes.  
  
"Stupid sheep" Kuwabara said sitting on a rock  
  
Yusuke came by. "Hey Kuwabara what with the sheep?" He asked  
  
"I have to watch them" Kuwabara said  
  
"Yes. Bar-b-que" Yusuke said  
  
"NO" Kuwabara said  
  
"Fine" Yusuke said leaving  
  
A sheep walked over to Kuwabara. Kuwabara looked at it. "MMM. You would look good with some bar-b-que sauce"  
  
The sheep some how knew what he was saying and they ran away. Kuwabara ran after them for hours and after 4 hours the sheep were back. Kuwabara got bored. he then cried "WOLF WOLF" Every one came running but all they found was Kuwabara cracking up on the floor pointing at them.  
  
"Stupid boy" a man said while every one went back to town which happened to be in the path of Kuwabaras laughing space so every one stepped on him.  
  
The sheep were eating. Kuwabara sat there. They started to walk over to him and started to bite him. Kuwabara screamed and started to run for about an hour and then the sheep got tired and stopped. Kuwabara breath heavily. He got tired again and called out "WOLF WOLF" The village came running for the sheep but found Kuwabara laughing again. They once again stepped all over him and left. Kuwabara was reading a comic book and saw Yoko Kurama coming. He yelled "WOLF WOLF" but no one came. Yoko Kurama went to one sheep and ate it (MMM).  
  
"Hey give him back" Kuwabara yelled  
  
"MMM sheep my favorite" Yoko Kurama said eating another sheep  
  
Kurama walked over to him and killed him and with some magic power he brought him back to life and killed him and brought him back to life then killed him again and brought him back to life and killed him again and again and again.  
  
Then the villagers came and saw Kurama kill Kuwabara over and over. They just started cheering Kurama on (you know wrestling style)  
  
But there was one person who wasnt cheering and it was Hiei. In fact he looked a bit sad. Oh wait those are only tears of hysteric laughing. I mean hes even rolling on the floor.  
  
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A/N: Moral to the story NEVER tick off a Yoko that hides seeds in his hair or else he will kill you and bring you back to life and then kill you again  
  
Kur: Sounds pleasent enough  
  
H: (still in hysterics)  
  
K: FEEL AUTHORESSES POWERS! (ALMIGHTY LIGHTNING)  
  
V: BOOM!  
  
Kur: (sweatdrop, anime fall, and mushroom sigh)  
  
K: ANIME TEARS (rainfal type)  
  
V: ANIME TERS (the bobble ball ones)  
  
H: why are you incolent fools crying  
  
K&V: no reason what so ever  
  
Kur: uh review please 


	8. The Three Billy Goats Gruff

A/N: So finally we updated sorry for the long wait! Was it a long wait I dunno I lost track of time! I dont even know what month it is!!  
  
So Ill ask this again (if I asked it!) does anyone know how to bold and/or Italic if you do please put it in a review! thanx  
  
K: I have to write a good convo  
  
V: MUHAHAHAHA  
  
H: hn  
  
Kur: I HATE THIS GERMAN HOMEWORK!  
  
K: Oh yes in our other story Kurama and Hiei proposed to use in convo time which means  
  
V: Were getting married to anime characters  
  
Kur: thanx for calling us a an...  
  
K: Its only the truth  
  
H: hn Ill do the fucking honor in saying that REVIEW OR DIE!  
  
K&V: thanx Mr. Suneshine  
  
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Three Billy Goats Gruff  
  
One day there were three goats on one side of a hill. There names were Kuwabara, Yusuke, and Kurama. They were pigging out on grass because they were not as civillized as humans and didn't have thumbs (Stupid Goats). So any way they were eating grass. Then they ran out like the dumb goats they were except for Kurama who had grass stored away for him-self.  
  
"I'm starving" Kuwabara said  
  
"I'm not" Kurama said  
  
"Me too" Yusuke said  
  
"I have some extra grass" Kurama said  
  
"What should we do?" Yusuke said  
  
"Um... I said I have some extra grass" Kurama said  
  
"Look over there. There is some grass over there" Kuwabara said  
  
"No need I have extra grass" Kurama said  
  
"Good idea lets go" Yusuke said  
  
"Wait doesn't a troll or something live under the brige" Kuwabara said  
  
"Nah lets go" Yusuke said  
  
"Um... Actually there is" Kurama said  
  
"Lets go Kuwabara" Yusuke said  
  
"Um.. You guys are going die if you try to cross the bridge" Kurama said  
  
"Did you hear something" Yusuke said to Kuwabara  
  
"Nah" Kuwabara said while they walked to the bridge  
  
"Um... Guys I really have some extra grass for us" Kurama said  
  
Kuwabara and Yusuke were at the bridge.  
  
"You first" Kuwabara said  
  
"Fine baby" Yusuke said  
  
*Tippidy Tap Tippidy Tap*  
  
"Whoes that walking over my bridge" a cold voice went  
  
"Me jack ass" Yusuke said  
  
"Shut up goat" The thing said  
  
"Who the fuck are you" Yusuke said  
  
"Hiei dumb goat. Wait how is it you can talk" Hiei said  
  
"DON'T CHANGE THE SUBJECT TROLL" Yusuke said  
  
"Um... Oh yeah I'm going to eat you now" Hiei said  
  
"Wait no um... There is a goat comming after me you can eat him" Yusuke said  
  
"Nah I'd rather eat you both" Hiei said  
  
"No wait there is another goat too. His name is Kurama" Yusuke said  
  
"Oh yeah Kurama he's over there he already crossed the bridge he said there was two goats comming and I said he could cross" Hiei said  
  
"KURAMA YOU TRAITOR" Yusuke yelled  
  
"SHOULD HAVE LISTENED" Kurama yelled back  
  
"Ok then I'm going to eat you now" Hiei said  
  
"..." Yusuke was dead  
  
Kuwabara was sleeping so he had no knowledge of what happened. He woke up thinking Yusuke was already on the other side of the hill. Kuwabara started to cross the bridge.  
  
*Tippidy Tap Tippidy Tap*  
  
"Who the fuck is crossing my bridge" Hiei said  
  
"YUKINA IS THAT YOU" Kuwabara said  
  
Kuwabara was dead before Hiei could answer.  
  
The End  
  
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A/N: So we are quckly running out of fairy tales since we HAVE NO CHILDHOOD!  
  
K: Somust Valmust domust youmust thinkmust themust readersmust understandmust mustingmust  
  
V: ifmust theymust domust thenmust theymust shouldmust reviewmust  
  
K: theymust shouldmust reviewmust anywaymust  
  
Kur: am I the only one in the dark  
  
H: yes  
  
K: wellmust imust ammust toomust boredmust toomust domust anythingmust  
  
V: well dont you have ss homework  
  
K: Kura-chan would you like to do my ss homework  
  
Kur: is that a request or a command  
  
V: a command  
  
K: just like I command all you readers to review  
  
H: hn 


	9. Snow White and the seven dwarfs

A/N:Lets just get straight to the story  
  
Disclaimer: I own nothing  
  
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Snow White And The Seven Dwarfs  
  
One upon a time, in a far away land lived a King Yusuke and his Queen Keiko the first. One day the queen died while giving birth to a baby girl. The girl was named Snow White, but every one called her Botan for some starnge unknown reason. Go figure. So anyway the King married a God awful wife, named Keiko the second. No relation to Keiko the first. That was there names. Again go figure. So Keiko the second, who will from now on will be called Keiko, was a very beautiful women. Everyone knew how evil Keiko was. One day King Yusuke 'mysteriously' died. Not saying Kekiko killed him or anything *wink*. Botan grew up into a beautiful girl she had skin white as snow, and hair black as the night, but then she dyed her hair a bright blue.. She would get more and more beautiful each day. Now Keiko being the crazy person she was, talked to her all knowing mirror, cause you know... You can talk to mirrors and all. Ok, Keiko would always ask the mirror  
  
"Mirror, Mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest one of all" and the mirro would always reply  
  
"You my queen are the fairest one of all"  
  
"Good" The queen would say and walk away to do God only knows what  
  
Years went by, and Botan turned eight-teen. One day the queen went up to the mirror and said  
  
"Mirror, Mirror on the wall who is the fairest on of all" and the Mirror replied  
  
"You my queen have a beauty quite rare, but Snow white has a beauty ten times more fair"  
  
"WHAT, SNOW WHITE, YOU MEAN BOTAN" Keiko yelled in a state of rage. She came up with a idea. She called for a hunter...  
  
"KUWABARA!" She called  
  
Kuwabara,the hunter, ran up to her room, bowed and said  
  
"Yes my queen"  
  
"I have a plan, now listen, I want you to bring Botan into the wood kill her and bring me her heart... But put it in a plastic bag or something cause I don't want to touch it... You know what just bring me her hand"  
  
Kuwabara looked in fear "Y-y-yes my queen" He said and backed up to the door  
  
"Actually, get her heart she could still be alive if you just get her heart" Keiko said  
  
Kuwabara nodded and ran off...  
  
~~~In the wood~~~  
  
"What are we doing in here, theres no candy" Botan said  
  
"Just a little further" Kuwabara said  
  
They took a few more steps and Kuwabara turned around and faced Botan. He held a dagger high in the air  
  
"NO NO PLEASE DON'T KILL ME" Botan yelled  
  
"What, oh no. I just wanted to cut this apple, but now that I think of it, I was supposed to kill you" Kuwabara said throwing away the apple and pointed the dagger to Botan.  
  
"NO NO PLEASE!" Botan yelled  
  
Kuwabara looked in her eyes and saw and saw the eyes, not of a eight-teen year old girl, but ones of a child.  
  
"Fine, but run, run deep into the forest and never return to you home" He said  
  
Botan ran into the deep forest. It was dark. She couldn't see where she was going and kept running into trees. She eventualy came to a small house and entered. It was really small. She had to bend down to walk around. She heard a knock on the door. She went to the door and opened it. There was a small girl with golden hair.  
  
"Hello" Botan said  
  
"Um.. Hi do the three bears live here?" She asked  
  
"No, sorry wrong story"  
  
"Oh, oops, bye"  
  
"Bye" Botan said and closed the door  
  
Botan looked around, everything was small. Cups, chairs, plates, tables, EVERTHING. She walked up stairs and was a room. It had seven beds. She put three of them together and fell asleep.  
  
~~~Meanwhile with Keiko~~~  
  
"Mirror, Mirror on the wall who is the fairest on of all" and the Mirror replied  
  
"You my queen have a beauty quite rare, but Snow white has a beauty ten times more fair"  
  
"WHAT! I GOT RID OF HER! KUWABARA" Keiko yelled  
  
"Yes mam'" He said  
  
"You would never lie to me would you?" Keiko asked  
  
"Of course not" He said  
  
"Good, now tell me Botan is dead" She said  
  
"Um... Well she, aaaaa"  
  
"You didn't kill her did you" The queen said angry  
  
"No mam'"  
  
"Fine then... GAURDS HANG HIM!" Keiko yelled  
  
"No wait" Kuwabara said while being dragged out of the room  
  
"Hm, I'll just kill her my-self" Keiko said and ran out of the room, and then came back because she remembered that she had no clue where Botan was...  
  
~~~Botan~~~  
  
Botans eyes fluttered open to see seven short men. They all looked the same. All had black spikey hair, with a white starburst in the middle, and all wore black pants and cloaks.  
  
"What are you doing here onna" Asked one  
  
"Well you see...  
  
~~~Later~~~  
  
And thats why I'm here" Botan said  
  
"So your here cause you evil step mother is trying to kill you?" Asked one  
  
"Yes, so can I stay here?" Botan asked  
  
"Fine, only if you do the cleaning and cooking and let us pick on you" One said  
  
"Fine" Botan said  
  
"Whats your name onna" Another asked  
  
"Snow White, but every one calls me Botan" She said  
  
"Why" They asked  
  
"I don't know" She said  
  
"Hn, doesn't matter we'll just call you onna"  
  
"um... ok, whats your names?"  
  
"I'm Evil"  
  
"I'm Selfish"  
  
"I'm Greedy"  
  
"I'm Obnoxious"  
  
"I'm Annoying"  
  
"I'm Aggressive"  
  
"I'm Hiei, the leader"  
  
"Ok" Botan said in a state of fear "So are you guys related?"  
  
"No" said Evil  
  
"In different towns far away, we were all mock because we were all short. We killed all the citizens in our towns. Looking for some place we would be accepted we all found each other and figured we could kill more people if we just band together" Hiei said  
  
"Oh, thats a some what cute story" Botan said  
  
"Hey onna, want to get dinner started" Aggressive said  
  
"Sure" She said and went down stairs to cook dinner  
  
After dinner every one went to sleep. When the dwarfs woke up, the woke up Botan. The jumped on her, and poured cold water on her head. It was fun... for the dwarfs.  
  
"Ok onna, we're going to go kill some people so don't leave or we might mistake you for some villager and kill you, then we wouldn't have and one to pester" Hiei said  
  
"And don't open the door" Selfish said  
  
"Why?" Botan asked  
  
"So if its your evil step mother you won't get killed, baka" Said Annoying  
  
"Ok" Botan said, the dwarfs went off on there killing spree and Botan started to clean, because the dwarfs found it funny to mess up the house so Botan would have to clean all day... It was hilarious. There was a knock on the door. Well now, Botan being the idiot she was opened it. It was an old lady.  
  
"Hello dear, I was just passing by and wanted to see if you wanted this poison free apple" The old lady asked  
  
"No thanks I hate apples" Botan said  
  
"Well then would you like this doghnout instead?" The old lady asked  
  
"A doghnout why didn't you say so give it here" Botan said and shoved the thing ito herr mouth and swallowed it... And dropped dead. The old lady looked in shock.  
  
"OH NO WHAT HAVE I DONE" The lady said and ran away hoping no one would notice. Awhile later the Queen came dressed up like a old lady, only the costume was terrible. You culd see her hair hanging out of the wig, and she had smooth skin. That costume sucked. So anyway she walked up to the house and saw Botan there dead  
  
"Hn, job well done, me" Keiko said congradulating her-self for nothing, and walked back to the castle and went to the mirror...  
  
"Mirror, Mirror, on the wall who is the fairest one of all" She asked  
  
"You my queen are the fairest on of all" The mirror said  
  
"Good"  
  
~~~The dwarfs~~~  
  
"Baka onna" Hiei said  
  
"We warned her" Obnoxious said  
  
"Hey you guys I have an idea, lets put her in a glass coffin, put her on top of that hill out side and see how is desperate enough to kiss her" Said Hiei  
  
They all smirked and put there plan into action. Greedy took watch of Botan. A prince named Koenma came up to her and Greedy.  
  
"Who is this?" Koenma asked  
  
"Botan" Said Greedy  
  
"I heard if you kiss a women, as beautiful as her, she would wake up" Said the prince  
  
"Um... yeah" Greedy said smirking  
  
Koenma kissed her and she woke up, another prince by the name of Kurama walked up to the scene...  
  
"Whats going on?" Kurama asked  
  
"MY HERO" Botan said hugging Kurama  
  
"um..." Kurama studered  
  
Botan kissed him and blah blah blah, they lived happly ever after except for Prince Koenma who is lonely... yeah  
  
~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~^~  
  
V: That was all me, not Kelly ME!  
  
H: Im so proud  
  
V: ^_^  
  
K: *grumble grumble grumble* 


End file.
